“Pineapple belongs on pizza.”
Pineapple on pizza is a crime against cheese and should be arrested on sight 🚨.
“Honesty is always the best policy.”
Oh sure, let me just tell my bestie her new cut looks like a poodle got electrocuted, because apparently hurting feelings is peak honesty 🙃.
“Mapple Syrup is the best syrup”
Maple syrup isn't the best syrup, it's just the most pretentious one that people pay extra for because of the fancy bottle.
“Hard work guarantees success.”
Hard work just guarantees you'll be tired and broke like everyone else 😴, luck and connections do the actual heavy lifting.
